When it comes to good vibes, the ones generating the best buzz are the quieter ones on the market. After all, who wants to worry about noise when you live at home, have housemates or might be sensitive to the sound?
There are a lot of reasons other than housemates why people may prefer a quieter vibe. This can include neurodiverse conditions such as ADHD or autism where you may find the noise distracting or uncomfortable. It may also be difficult to determine the volume levels of a toy if you are deaf or hearing impaired.
Sadly, not all vibes are created equal, so some can be a lot louder than others creating potentially uncomfortable situations all around. However, there are some out there that are quieter than others.
It’s important to note that all toys will have some sound, and the higher the setting, the more noise it will make. That said, toy companies are becoming aware of the need for ‘quiet time’ and creating better options.
Putting the toys to the test
We’ve created a list of the Top Five Toys we rated and recommend for a practically silent session.
Some important things to note about the tester: they are a non-binary person with a vulva so the toys are chosen with this in mind. They are also neurodiverse so sound can be an issue for them.
The Smile Makers. The artist vibrator
The artist is a wonderful innovative toy and has become something of a favourite in recent times thanks to its versatility.
This almost silent toy is possibly one of the quietest vibes we have ever sampled although it’s worth noting that it does get louder when the speed increases. However, it’s nothing that can’t be covered with a closed-door – it doesn’t need much.
When it comes to speed, the toy has nine pulsation modes, but it’s the way that they can be used which makes it a clever purchase. The toy has two parts: one for insertion and another for clitoral stimulation. It can also be used for clitoral or penetration alone if you prefer one or the other. As clinical as that sounds, dual stimulation toys don’t come to play when it comes to the main event.
It has been designed for vulva owners and does fit the body perfectly, although it is also adjustable in case you need a minor change. It also features two sensors at the side of the toy which allow you to select two different pulsations for either part of the vibe. It’s the truly customisable options that makes it a great purchase.
It’s also easily gripped, waterproof, easy to clean, and also scores bonus points for not being gendered or shaped like a rabbit.
This is a great purchase for anyone who needs a well-designed toy with options.
£107 Shop here
Ann Summers. The Whisper Clitoral stimulator
Ann Summers is one of the most notorious sex shops on the high street so it can often be the first venture for beginners new to sex shops. The online store also feels a little less scary than some of the other options out there.
The Whisper is a clitoral stimulator that has two rounded sides that pulsate. It can also be used as a bullet vibe. It’s a great choice for anyone who enjoys a bit of clitoral action or prefers a firmer texture from a toy. Texture can matter when it comes to selecting the right toy as some people prefer softer or harder materials. The body-safe silicone of Whisper is firmer than it feels and provides the right level of stimulation. It’s a lot easier to grip than a standard bullet too.
The toy offers 11 different patterns and speeds but doesn’t compromise on strength despite its quietness. It estimates that it comes in at 35db which makes it house share ready.
The Whisper toys are great for anyone who might be searching for a starter vibrator but feels a little frightened by some of the tech options out there. It is incredibly easy to operate as you just need to click and go – no fancy app pairing or confusing buttons to learn about.
If a bullet-style toy isn’t your thing but you like the quietness of the Whisper then it’s worth noting that this is a collection. There is also an insertion option which has the iconic Ann Summers rabbit shape. They even have a more classically shaped bullet so you can find what works for you.
£48 Shop here
Mystery Vibe. Poco vibrator
The Poco vibrator is an impressively designed toy which has been created to feel like a finger. The toy bends into almost a U-shape in the body with a little bit of pressure. It can be used either for insertion or held against the clitoris for extra stimulation. There are two joints on the toy so you can curve it into three sections which fit your own body or between yourself and your partner.
There is some noise with Poco but it’s nothing a closed-door or light music couldn’t handle. It’s more of a low purr or pulsating noise in comparison to a full-scale intense rumble.
The smaller size of the vibe at 1.6 inches at the widest point, and 5.9 inches long. Making it a great option for anyone who is feeling nervous about making the jump into sex toys – especially anyone worried about noise levels.
For couples who like a technical option, the vibrator can be paired with an app that your partner can control. It’s also waterproof so it can be taken into the shower to mix it up a bit.
The vibe has eight different speeds and 16 different intensities which you can mix and match so it is very difficult to get bored. You can also program it to remember your preferences as well so even if you forget a favourite setting – the vibe won’t.
£90 Shop here
Dame products. The Com
This has become ‘the one’ in what is a very overcrowded bedside table drawer. The com is a great toy and one of the more quiet ones we have quite literally come across. It’s a fantastic option for anyone struggling with reach, grip or someone who needs a strong pressure or firmer texture from a toy.
It’s a truly quiet vibrator that doesn’t sacrifice strength for silence when it gets going. It was impressively silent only letting out a solid purr sound instead of the usual buzz.
The com, despite its design, is actually a clitoral stimulator although it looks more like an insertion toy. It’s designed to fit with the body so the medical-grade silicone is soft to the touch and sleekly contoured. It features five different patterns or intensities so you can mix and match to see what suits you.
The stronger the setting, the better the vibes – trust us on that. As with all vibrators, the noise does increase slightly if you up the ante on the speed but it’s still not that loud in comparison to others out there.
The powerful toy is really simple and quick to use which is great for anyone looking for something easy to hold with intensity. Or something that is no muss, no fuss – just good vibes all around.
£125 Shop here
Sinful 2 in 1 Bliss
Sinful is one of the quietest multi-use toys out there and it makes a great couples toy. It comes in two parts: a remote and a simple egg-shaped toy with ten speeds. The layout is thankfully simple and it’s really easy to use.
The versatility vibe can be used in many different ways. Including as a clitoral bullet, insertion toy or remote-control option. This means lots of super options for solo or couple play. The different choices with this toy made it fun to use as it felt like the options were endless with it.
The vibrations could be intense but thankfully it does come with a softer side too. The versatile toy also looks discreet and is contoured to the body similar to the artist and com.
If any criticism, sometimes love eggs can be difficult to use if you rely on someone to help you position sex toys or struggle with grip. What goes up, must come down… so all egg-shaped toys like this need a well-attached cord to help them be removed.
We did like that the toy wasn’t gendered which made it more appealing and it came in a neutral colour too. The range on the toy is 10 meters but frankly, we ended up not making it that far apart when testing….
£47.99 Shop here
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