It’s been really exciting to see the distinctions between the different countries, both in terms of policies but also disability rights movements.
I would say that the UK has the most diverse array of disability and sexuality-focused organisations, and especially with regards to those that are led by disabled people.
Special ’sex care’ services as well as sex
There’s no doubt you’ve heard all the statements out there about smear tests, encouraging those of us who are busy, scared or just downright lazy to crack on and book an appointment. ‘It literally takes two minutes, it doesn’t hurt, and it’s FAR more important than it is embarrassing’. All absolutely true, for the most part, but is it the same experience for a disabled woman?
I’m more interested in feeling sexy by my own standards and of course, I would like my partner to find me desirable as well. I’ve gone through a long journey with my body before landing here. I’ve always had a pretty strong connection with my sexuality.
I don’t really think of my body in terms
Society seems to think that disabled people don’t, won’t and can’t have sex, and that’s a myth that we are here to dispel. Want to join us? Keep reading!
The new guidelines are a great step to ensure that disabled people can receive the support they need in making sexual needs and desires accessible.
Whilst living at Arnold House, Leonard Cheshire Home, I became engaged to another Service User called Robert.
Obviously we were both disabled using wheelchairs but we wanted to be like other couples and have a good relationship involving sexual play. This proved harder than you think because we couldn’t have time together during the day as everyone was around and so couldn’t do anything. Therefore the only time we could be together was when I was in bed and and wait for Rob to come in. We couldn’t do anything until the drinks came in though, as it could have been awkward.
On one occasion we were playing and a carer didn’t knock on the door and just burst in, this made us both feel embarrassed and it just put us off doing anything. After that incident we found a way by asking the carers not to come into the room until 11pm when Rob went back to his room.
I wished we could have had more chances to play but alas it was not practical. What we did together was lovely and it made me feel like a normal couple really in love with each other and clearly sexually active. This is not true of all homes but I feel if people are in love they should be helped to lead a proper friendship without any problems or embarrassments.
