My friends and I discuss our sex lives and I don’t know if it’s an age thing, or a long term relationship thing but I know I’m not alone in needing more in the bedroom than I’m currently getting. Any tips for approaching this topic in a way that won’t bruise my husband’s ego would be ace, thanks.
Hello. Boring, routine sex, as you put it, is not unusual for many couples. Especially if you’ve been together a while or have had a change in the circumstances of your relationship recently.
Communication is key
Communication of some kind is the only real answer here. Maybe you could change your approach to discussing this with your husband who is feeling defensive?
Instead of talking about boring, routine sex perhaps take it back to basics and ask him about what he likes in bed?
When we’ve been with someone for a while, it’s easy to think we know everything about them, including their fantasies and desires . As with anything in life, our tastes can change, and he might have felt unable to express this change to you. A more open, honest and positive chat might just do the trick.
What do you want out of your sex life?
If talking it through doesn’t go to plan then it’s time for Plan B. Ask yourself. What do I want from our sex life? Figure that out then make a move with something new such as:
- role play – time to fantasise
- new sex toy – check out our accessible sex toy suggestions
- lingerie that makes you feel amazing
Taking the initiative and spicing things up in a way that makes you feel sexy and in control might be the wake up call your husband needs to respond in the way you want and be more inventive in general.
Give it a go, hope this helps!
Got a question about relationships, disabled dating or sex and intimacy? Write to us and our sexperts will offer free advice.