Hi Love Lounge,

My brother is a wheelchair user.  He’s 15 and wants to date.  The problem is he nearly always has me or our parents with him.  How can I make relationships more possible for him?

Amy

 

Hi Amy, thanks so much for writing in to us.  This is a really good question.  We often forget that our own wants and desires can affect the people around us, and it’s unfortunate that, for those of us who are disabled and often require some extra support, this can affect our ability to do what everyone else seems to be doing.  In a teenager’s case – dating!

Your brother is still going to require your support, but maybe it’s time for you to sit down together and discuss the areas in which he might be able to have a bit more independence.  Perhaps there are events he could go to on his own after school where he could potentially meet someone, or even just have the opportunity to talk to new people and be himself? Maybe there’s a group of friends he hangs out with regularly that would be happy to take over some of his support needs at weekends, so that he can be with them rather than his family? These are just a few options, but the fact that you’ve contacted us to ask this question means that you’re heading in the right direction anyway! All that needs to happen now is lots of open, honest communication, and I’m sure your brother will feel a little more freedom in no time.

Good luck!
Em x

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