“I have Muscular Dystrophy and my girlfriend has Cerebral Palsy…”

“I have muscular dystrophy and my girlfriend has cerebral palsy. We’ve been together 7 months and we need advice as to moving forward and getting more intimate. We both have severe disability and limited movement.” – Richard

Hi Richard,

Great to hear from you and many thanks for contacting the Love Lounge.  Finding intimacy that works can undoubtedly be more difficult when you and your partner both have a disability, but certainly not impossible! I have Cerebral Palsy myself and I am currently with an able-bodied partner, but I have had very fulfilling sexual relationships with other disabled partners too.

The biggest and best bit of advice I can give to you regarding taking steps forward in terms of intimacy is… talk to each other.  Finding out what works and what doesnt with sex is always going to be a method of trial and error.  When you are trying different positions, for example, make sure that you are both always communicating with each other to confirm you’re both happy, comfortable and enjoying what’s going on.

A wonderfully intimate relationship does not have to include penetrative sex either.  I’ve had some amazing sex without having intercourse.  Get comfortable laying with each other and telling each other what feels good and what you’d like to try.  Certain sex toys might make things really enjoyable whilst also allowing you both to be comfortable and not too physically active too soon.  Funnily enough, I’ve just been told about a voice-controlled vibrator that might help those with limited movement.  See what you think!http://www.honour.co.uk/silicone-voice-activated-vibrator-amy.php#long-description

Additionally, to help make certain positions more comfortable, check out Liberator ramps and wedges (a little on the pricey side, so they might just give you a bit of inspiration of similar products you could use at home) http://www.liberator.com/wedge-ramp-combo.html

Really hope this helps.  Please let me know how you get on and if you need anymore specific advice, just shout! 🙂

Emily x

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